Featured Poet - Peggy Gerber

LOVE LETTER TO MYSELF

When she looks in the mirror, all she sees are the wrinkles around her eyes, her nose, her mouth, the deep vertical indentations etched into her forehead, and her heart turns to stone because she feels her beauty fading with each tick of the clock.

What I see is a face that has laughed and cried, lips that have kissed a husband and children, and weathered all the experiences and hardships of life. I see a face that shines with the beauty of wisdom and maturity.

When she looks in the mirror, she sees hips and a belly curved and rounded, grooved with stretch marks crisscrossing like a road map, and the word “FAT” burns in her brain. Irrational and illogical, she longs for the unnatural washboard abs seen on actresses and models in Hollywood.

What I see is the miracle of life. A woman formed the way Mother Nature intended, with the natural roundness that has the purpose and ability to create new life and nurture it into existence. 

When she looks in the mirror, she sees legs that are too fat, or too skinny or too long or too short, and she hates herself because she does not fit in with society’s ideal.

What I see is the awesome ability of being able to carry around a healthy body, proud and strong, that has important work to do.

When she looks in the mirror, she sees breasts that are too big, or too small or too something else, and she feels bad about herself, longing for the look of that artificial perfection created in a lab and showcased in the media.

What I see is one of the most cherished parts of being a woman. The miraculous ability to produce milk, to feed and nourish a brand-new child. To bring comfort and love to a tiny human unwillingly thrust into a dangerous world.

When she looks in the mirror, all she sees are her imperfections, taunting and challenging the essence of her self-worth.

What I see are all her hopes and her dreams and her talents and her accomplishments and all the love she has given and received in her life. I see her in all her perfection.

If only she could see what I see.



DEAR DR. GOOGLE,

I am hereby officially terminating our relationship!

Though, unquestionably a brilliant source of medical information, 

you are a fear monger and a tyrant.

A pit bull ready to pounce.

You spit out your catastrophic predictions

demolishing our serenity like a nuclear bomb,

trifling with our fragile emotions.

Dr. Google, when I consulted you about my

burning throat, you told me it might be reflux,

but be prepared for cancer. 

Terrified, I pleaded for an endoscopy and

four thousand dollars later learned I had reflux. 

How about the time I had that shortness of breath,

you suggested it might be anxiety,

but be prepared for heart disease or cancer. 

Petrified, I pleaded for a stress test and one thousand

dollars later learned I had anxiety.

Thanks to you, I had anxiety about my anxiety.

Dr. Google, breaking off this relationship 

will be one of the hardest things I have ever done.

After all, you are in my phone, my computer, 

my kitchen, my bathroom.

You are in the very air that I breathe.

But I have come to realize that this 

twisted, toxic relationship must come to an end. 

Dr. Google, you have implanted in me a health

anxiety as deep as the ocean and I am sick of it!

I am ready to let you go. 

So, goodbye Dr. Google, and good riddance.

         Sincerely,

          Me

P.S. Don’t try to sneak into my Facebook feed. 

I will delete you.

STUMBLING IN CRAZYTOWN

I stumbled down a hole into CrazyTown,

where reality was transformed upside down,

where the dark of night consumed my day,

and red horned demons came out to play.

I felt trapped like a caged bird inside my head,

and it took all my courage just to get out of bed.

Thoughts get twisted like a pretzel down in CrazyTown,

I was dazed and confused, desperate to be found.

When my daughter started crying, “Mommy, where’d you go?”

I made the brave decision to dig out of that dark hole.

I clawed like a lion to climb out of that deep pit,

digging in my talons I crawled upwards bit by bit, and

I banished those demons with their horns of bloody red,

and I set free that caged bird trapped inside my head,

and I fought an epic battle till I got back home.

Now it takes all my courage just to share this poem.

Taken from STUMBLING IN CRAZYTOWN, by Peggy Gerber. CLICK HERE for further details and to order a copy.