DEPARTING DEPRESSION

My sheets cascade

as tidal waves

as a storm is ushered in.

There's a tear stained pillowcase

I'd rather be smothered with.

Though I am buried under miles of grief

Surely the waves will carry me through the wildest sea.

With a history of anguish, it's hard to be buoyant

Grief knows no language, so I remain voiceless. 

All I know is the sink

Not the resurfacing.

And yet 

There!

On the shoreline

Beneath a blanket of stars

Hope flickered before my eyes

And here, I'll drop the anchor of my heart.

EVIL CORRUPTS THOSE WITH GOOD INTENTIONS

The bottle is easier to carry

than the life you have since buried.

Most nights I pray that you're warm at least

But you have strayed so far into a vast sea

Your bottle is your anchor,

Abstinence, your savior 

Your heart and head begin to wager

There's a war between your morals and your anger.

The bottle, a sharpened spade

The bottle unearths your grave

that you aren't yet in.

Because evil corrupts those with good intentions.

THE WOLF'S WAKENING

The forest is tranquil, the trees are canopies of crowns.

What flourishes, I thirst to kill, as they roam my stomping grounds.

My pain is buried beneath

Their sanctuary of peace.

I'm a wolf on the prowl

Making widows in the wilderness

So into the bleak, I howl.

Echoing back is my bitterness

I used to be all teeth, no growl.

The forest is serene, 

the pines whistle to the tune of the faint, whispery wind.

The chorus reconvenes, 

My fur bristles when the moon wanes through the limbs.

My pain queried to me,

This sanctuary of peace,

Why do you hunt when you're only prey

are the demons in your gut that you can't slay?

The forest is tranquil

A wolverine with it's pain killed,

With bent branches and recoiled honeysuckle vines

I went to dance in, ever so spoiled with the sun's light.

ABOUT THE POET: I have depression, generalized anxiety, and PTSD, and have been in therapy half my life; currently being treated for borderline personality disorder. I write not for my sake, but to destigmatize BPD, and also for those who are struggling in silence (whether it be mental health or substance abuse.)

E: saraboydmerritt@gmail.com